Breakups can be complicated and sometimes it’s hard to pinpoint the breakup on any one particular reason, be it having opposite interests, financial difficulties, jealousy, emotional coldness, vices such as one partner having gambling or drinking problems. Usually when a relationship breaks down at least one person can be left confused as to what actually went wrong and whether there’s any chance of getting the relationship repaired. It’s during these times that our emotions are all over the place and we can find ourselves asking ‘why did they do it’ and ‘how can I fix it’.
Feeling depressed and miserable seem to be the order of the day. We often follow this with a period of making plans on how we will get them back. The problem is how realistic are our plans, will they work.
How can you tell if your ex is receptive to giving the relationship another chance? One thing that you should be doing, if you’ve recently split, is to give your ex a bit of space for a while. You should also be understanding towards your ex as they will be feeling vulnerable if the relationship that has just ended was true and sincere. This is the time to let your caring character come through by being respectful and giving them plenty of space.
If you let your emotions control what’s going on it’s likely that you will complicate a delicate situation and could jeopardise your chances of rebuilding your relationship. While you’re having some space and time to yourself try and use it positively. You should try to figure out why it went wrong and whether there is hope of fixing it or whether there is major differences in the type of people the two of you are.
What type of partner were you? Overbearing and suffocating or aloof and un-emotional? Were you constantly criticising your ex? It’s easy to do, although sometimes hard to notice when you’re actually doing it. Maybe your bad habits pushed your ex over the edge? Be honest with yourself about any short falls, both in you and your ex’s behaviour, it’s all part of the process of becoming a better lover and partner.
Although the argument that led to the bust-up may have been one or the others fault, both of you have probably done things to put you where you are now. Sometimes it’s hard to figure out exactly how the relationship fell apart. In such cases it’s worth turning to close friends and family and asking for there opinion. However, you may not always like what you hear.
Take their opinions in earnest and constructively use that information to improve yourself and to heal from your hurt.
Try to maintain the no contact strategy for a reasonable amount of time, if your ex contacts you don’t come across as needy and desperate. Be reasonable though as you don’t want to push them away, you just want to show your independence. Let your ex know that you’ve been keeping busy and tell them of any other interests you have taken up.
Let your ex at least initiate some sort of move as this will let you know if they still want you. If your ex still shows interest then leave it a day or two and then give them a call and ask them out for a coffee or something casual like that. You should at this point be in the driving seat, you’ve been calm and cool and haven’t shown a needy or desperate persona. You’ve also allowed your ex to make the first move, taking the pressure off you.
If everything has gone right you should realise you’ve been given a second chance and that it’s up to you to do the right things in order to keep the relationship alive.
Other Articles That May Interest You
- Getting an Ex to Want You Back Again
- Getting Your Boyfriend Back After a Breakup
- Using Reverse Psychology to Get an Ex back
- Can You Get an Ex Girlfriend Back if She’s Moved On
- Things Not to Do When Trying to Get an Ex Back